Being fat and fit

Since I had my children, I have always had a battle with my weight.  Up until the age of 23 I could eat what I wanted, do little to no exercise and never get bigger than a size 10.  AB (after birth) all that changed. I went on my first ever diet, Jenny Craig (and have ever since been a lifetime member!) to lose the baby weight.
 
Heaven knows how I put on so much weight, I vomited for 9 straight months (well 9 months and 2 weeks actually, he went over) and could barely keep down a glass of water.  I should have seen this as a sign that the skinny gods were not on my side - from this time on its been a roller coaster yo-yo ride of get fat, hate myself, go on a diet, lose the weight, get fed up with dieting, put all the weight back on plus a good handful more for good measure and to teach me to mess with skinny gods, hate myself, go on a diet ...... well you see where this is heading.
 
The last round was when I was on Jenny Craig for a whole 12 months - 12 freakin months of microwaved dinners, tiny packages of cereal and snacks, and weekly weigh ins.  I was running 5km 3 times a week, seeing a personal trainer for an hour and half session 3 times a week, and walking home from work 12km twice a week.
 
Net result of all that?  Still fat (by modern magazine terms - size 14) but fit as hell.  Then I ran the 12km City to Surf and after giving myself a hearty high five found I had damaged my knee so badly I was unable to run anymore.  I needed an operation, but this has not fixed the pain and damage and so now I need a knee replacement.  Brilliant!  Who says exercising is good for you!

In true form, I have put back on all the weight plus another handful or two chucked in - but worse than that I have stopped doing any exercise and am very unfit and unhealthy.  Its always such a huge mental feat to drag myself up to start again, but I know I must for my health.

I have just watched my wonderful mother have a hip replacement that went so well and she is recovering so quickly as she is fit and strong and healthy.  I don't want to go the way of my mother in law (who I see everyday as she lives with us) and be fat and ill and so very unhealthy. 

I eat good food (mostly - says she who just had a Turkish Delight!)- wholesome and largely unprocessed - but probably too much of it.  But more than diet I need to get out and move my body.  I don't like structured exercise, its such a waste of energy.  Rather I like to work and move my body naturally.  Digging in the garden, feeding the horses, sweeping, raking, weeding.  Walking around the paddocks.  I would rather do this anyday than run on a treadmill in the gym. 

Until I can live on my farm, I am doomed to be a rat in a cage :-) But this fat rat needs to get on the wheel and start running about!