I was told this three times over this past weekend and at first it made me feel really (and I mean really!) flattered. At 48, every woman this age is looking to eek out the last of their youth. And to be told you look young is the ultimate compliment. Isn't it?
Well it appears my brain says no. So attuned to being negative about myself, after the initial thrill of the compliment, this is the path my brain took us down.
Brain: You know why you look too young for a 25 year old son don't you?
Me: Because I inherited good genes from both my parents - they both look (and act) very young for their age?
Brain: Don't be so naive.
Brain: What they are really saying is that you look young because you are, which means you must have had your kids when you were young, which means you are a bad girl!
Me: But I was married when I had my first baby.
Brain: Yeah, they think its because you had to get married.
Me: But I didn't, I actually fell pregnant on my honeymoon. I was 23.
Brain: They think you were some teenage bride who got married to escape the little country town you lived it.
Me: I lived with my husband for four years before we got married and I went BACK to the little country town, not away from it. You are just mean Brain.
Brain: Hey, don't shoot the messenger. I am just telling you what all those nice people really think.
Me: Its not true. They were being genuinely nice when they said I look young.
Brain: They are nice to you because you are fat and its the only compliment they can pay you.
Me: Shut up Brain, i am going to ignore you now.
My Brain and I don't get along that well, and from the above excerpt you can see why. I was young when I married and had my first son. Well, young by today's standards. Back then, in the 80's it was quiet normal, especially in a country town. Breeding is important in the country!
I will admit it was hard at first, being a mum and watching my footloose friends backpack through Europe, or have careers that they could travel, or go out partying late at night. But now, at 48, I am an empty-nester, both
So Brain, here is a message for you. The next time some kind person says we look too young to have adult children - you can go take a hike and I will bask in their compliment.
Thank you to those people, it made me smile.
|My 40th Birthday with my wonderful boys. xx|